This man can truthfully tell “in Soviet Russia” jokes

The only parts of my CS theory class I fully grasp are the random jokes the teacher dispenses that are vaguely related to the lecture.

God gave the three best possible merits to Russians. However, to be fair, he would only give two of three to any one person: honesty, intelligence, and party membership. [This was printed in a Communist newspaper, but with a very large end note, explaining that party meant Nazi party, obviously.]

Prior to World War 2, Russia had near-unlimited manpower and extensive funds, which were pooled with the intent to make Russia a bastion for academia. They gathered the best minds and set them to the task of perfecting weather forecasting. Yet even with all these resources, they were only able to attain 40% accuracy. They were thus astounded that a small town in Russia was able to predict the weather with 150% efficiency compared to their national weather forecasting center. The leaders of the center traveled to the town, eager to learn how they were able to achieve 60% accuracy. The town forecaster responded, “Easy, we just take what you say and tell people the opposite.”

5 comments on This man can truthfully tell “in Soviet Russia” jokes

  1. When I was little, I remember reading this awesome little kid book about the protagonist in a village trying to predict the weather. His father tells him all these examples (the flowers turn that way etc) and he runs off before his dad can finally tell him the most important. When he comes back having failed to predict the weather, his father tells him that the most important one was listening to the weather channel. 🙂

    I, er, didn’t know that there were Russians in the Nazi party. Wouldn’t that be self-hating since Hitler despised all slavs?

    1. The “by party we mean Nazi party, because obviously no one would criticize the communist party *cough*” bit should have been highlighted more.

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