I bombed the latest AP Computer Science test (and by bombed I mean under 80 when I thought I did well). Most of the point deduction came from my imperfect knowledge of sorting. We were given a list of numbers, like [2, 6, 4, 11, 9] and we had to use a sorting method called Insertion Sort to sort through it step by step. However, I mixed up my sorts and threw my teacher off so much that I couldn’t receive partial credit. It also threw me off when I reread my sort, as I couldn’t recognize it and my friend couldn’t figure out what sort I was using. It was sorted according to a certain procedure, but the procedure didn’t ring a bell, so I thought I had made an entirely new sort. Taking the opportunity as it was presented, I named it the Steven Sort (alliteration!). I used the Steven Sort in a future program just to spite the teacher.

I later realized that the Steven Sort was in fact just a ghetto Selection Sort (more alliteration!) that sorted from the end of the list instead of the front. So much for the Nobel Prize.

Stuy teacher, telling students to relax and smell the roses: “I’ve never pulled an all-nighter in high school. Okay, I’ve pulled one. On prom night. But I wasn’t studying; I was learning.”