The Domain of Steven Pinnacle of Paperless Perfection

5Dec/042

Wow, a game that took precedence over Half-Life 2

"Just know that whenever I see this in your writing, you're taking minutes off my life!"
*we laugh*
"I'm glad you all find that funny!!!"
-My English teacher

Sid Meier's Pirates! is the only game where I can:

  • Own a fleet of ships with my pristine flagship being followed by several captured ships in tatters
  • Get but not fulfill most quests, resulting in encountering three "Colonel Mendoza"s right next to each other
  • Free the governor's daughters that the Mendozas had captured but not return them to their fathers, resulting in several hot wenches residing in my cabin
  • Get fired upon by the ports of governors whose daughters I have, which says a lot about how much they cared for their daughters
  • Dance with grace and get married to a hot French chick
  • Get berated by the chick's father for sinking a bunch of ships belong to his faction, then given a promotion and his blessing to marry his daughter
  • Uncover buried treasure of progressively smaller amounts
  • Have part of the map pertaining to the whereabouts of my long lost father but not bother getting the other part, because getting the other part would be wasting valuable plundering time

Ken Jennings was cool, but this proves he's even cooler. Notice that the other guy is thinking, "What an idiot...".

Comments (2) Trackbacks (0)
  1. OH . MY. GOD.

    WHAT’S A HO

    SO FUNNY.

    i ..die.

  2. Must be an english teacher thing. The pair quote is:

    “OK. If in a few years you see me standing on the top of your school towwer with a machine gun (this is not a threat, BTW), well, if you see me there, I would like to tell you now. It is ALL YOUR FAULT!!! This is not a threat.”
    -English Intern (who was also a son of our ex-principal. And his brother went to school there that year. But thats a different story)


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